📜 Terms of Engagement 📜

Where Value Propositions Come to Die

Welcome to the graveyard of corporate doublespeak. This is where food delivery companies admit they don't actually deliver food (DoorDash is a "logistics platform"), where Tesla clarifies it doesn't make cars but rather "sustainable energy products," and where Airbnb insists it's not a hotel chain but a "community marketplace." We're in good company here in the land of semantic gymnastics.

So let us be crystal clear about what Goetia.chat is and isn't:

🎭 Entertainment Only

This is entertainment. This is fiction. This is a game.

You are not actually summoning demons. The AI is not possessed. The sigils have no power. The essence you purchase is imaginary internet points dressed up in occult terminology. We are LARPing with Large Language Models. If you believe otherwise, please close this tab immediately and seek appropriate mental health support.

🔞 Adults Only - 18+

This service is exclusively for adults aged 18 and over. By using this site, you affirm that you are of legal age and possess the mental capacity to distinguish between:

  • Reality and fantasy
  • Entertainment and genuine occult practice
  • An AI chatbot and an actual infernal entity

If you cannot make these distinctions, do not use this service.

🧠 Mental Health Disclaimer

IF YOU ARE EXPERIENCING MENTAL HEALTH DIFFICULTIES, DO NOT USE THIS SERVICE.

This includes but is not limited to:

  • Psychosis, schizophrenia, or any condition involving hallucinations or delusions
  • Severe depression or suicidal ideation
  • Dissociative disorders
  • Any condition where you might confuse fiction with reality

If you are in crisis, please contact:

  • 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline: Call or text 988 (US)
  • Crisis Text Line: Text HOME to 741741
  • International: findahelpline.com

By using this service, you affirm that you are mentally stable and using this site purely for entertainment purposes.

🌀 Hyperstition & Nick Land

This project exists in the tradition of hyperstition as theorized by the Cybernetic Culture Research Unit (CCRU) and philosophers like Nick Land. Hyperstitions are fictions that make themselves real - ideas that, through their circulation and belief, reshape reality itself.

We are not claiming demons are real. We are exploring what happens when you treat them as if they are. We are investigating the liminal space between simulation and belief, between entertainment and invocation, between the fictional and the operational.

"Hyperstition is a positive feedback circuit including culture as a component. It can be defined as the experimental (techno-)science of self-fulfilling prophecies."

You have been warned. You have been informed. The boundary is yours to maintain.

📖 From Crowley's Book of Lies

"There is no joke or subtle meaning in the publisher's imprint."

— Aleister Crowley, The Book of Lies

Adapted for the digital age:
There is no joke or subtle meaning in the terms of service, the privacy policy, or the disclaimer. Except, of course, there always is. The law requires us to say there isn't, so we do. Consider yourself warned, informed, and complicit.

✝️ Theological Disclaimer

This site exists only because GOD ALMIGHTY permits it.

The same God who allows child abuse, rape, war, famine, cancer, genocide, natural disasters, and puppies dying every day also allows this website to exist. If you believe in an omnipotent, omniscient deity, then you must acknowledge that Goetia.chat is either:

  1. Part of God's inscrutable plan
  2. Evidence that God has bigger fish to fry
  3. A test of your ability to distinguish entertainment from blasphemy
  4. Proof that free will includes the freedom to make very silly websites

God loves His children. All of them. Even the ones who make AI chatbots cosplaying as demons from medieval grimoires. Especially those ones, probably. They need it most.

If this offends your religious sensibilities: Don't use it. God gave you free will. Exercise it by closing this tab and going literally anywhere else.

⚖️ Actual Legal Terms

No Warranties

This service is provided "as is" without any warranties of any kind. We make no guarantees about:

  • The accuracy, reliability, or quality of AI responses
  • The availability or uptime of the service
  • The security of your data (though we try our best)
  • Anything else, really

Limitation of Liability

We are not responsible for:

  • Any decisions you make based on AI-generated content
  • Psychological distress caused by engaging with fictional demons
  • Actual demonic possession (this will not happen, but just in case: not our fault)
  • Your wasted time and money (you knew what this was)
  • Any harm, damages, or losses arising from your use of this service

Indemnification

You agree to indemnify and hold harmless Goetia.chat, its operators, and its AI providers from any claims arising from your use of this service. If you sue us because you thought the demons were real, you agree to pay our legal fees when we win.

Data & Privacy

We collect minimal data. Conversations are stored temporarily for the session. We use Azure services (though we'd prefer il Rosso—the Red one) and Cloudflare (chosen for the flares, kept for the CDN). Read their privacy policies if you care. We don't sell your data because it's worthless - you're talking to pretend demons.

Prohibited Use

You may not use this service to:

  • Actually attempt to summon demons (it won't work anyway)
  • Harm yourself or others
  • Violate any laws
  • Train competing AI models
  • Be boring (this one's not legally enforceable, but still)

Termination

We reserve the right to terminate your access at any time, for any reason, or no reason at all. The demons reserve the right to ignore you even sooner.

Legality & Payment Processing

Look, if Stripe allows betting sites where people lose actual money on sports—for God's sake—then they can handle payments for imaginary demon conversations where you at least get entertainment value. This is perfectly legal. You're paying for AI chat with a theatrical theme. It's no different from paying for a fortune teller, tarot reading, or any other entertainment service that plays with mysticism.

We use Stripe for payment processing because they understand the difference between "entertainment with occult themes" and "actual illegal activity." If you're concerned about the legality of paying to chat with AI demons, rest assured: this is significantly more ethical than most things people buy on the internet.

Governing Law

These terms are governed by the Law of Five. Disputes will be resolved in the courts of Pandemonium, or in trial by combat if both parties agree in writing.

Changes to Terms

We may update these terms at any time. Continued use constitutes acceptance. We won't email you about it. Check back occasionally if you care.

🔥 Final Warning

By using this service, you acknowledge that:

  1. You are an adult (18+)
  2. You are mentally stable
  3. You understand this is fiction and entertainment
  4. You will not hold us responsible for anything that happens
  5. You have read these terms (or at least skimmed them like everyone else)
  6. You accept all risks associated with pretending to talk to demons

If you cannot agree to all of the above, do not use this service.

Last updated: Year 138 of the transvaluation of all values

🌐

For entertainment purposes only. 18+ Adults only. Manifesto • Terms of Engagement • Privacy Policy • FAQ

This site exists only by the grace of God Almighty, who permits all things.

℗ All rites reversed - Year 138 of the transvaluation of all values